1) Free All Expense Paid Trip to Ireland, No Strings Attached!
*You know, where the History comes from*
2) Education Grants for Clowns! We've Got More Money Than We Know What To Do With!
3) How to Make Your Space Your Own while Sharing 330 sq feet with a Boy
4) 100 Tattoos That Actually Make You A More Interesting Person and Adequately Reflect Your Personality
5) Creative Jobs in Norway, Australia, New Zealand, Scotland, England and France! We Supply Visas!
6) Be The Person Your Knick Knacks and Jewelery Say You Are!
7) Trade Your Student Loans for a Car!*
*this is my actual dream car, btw*
8) New Miracle Depression Cure is Already In Your House!
*aw man! It was RIGHT THERE ALL ALONG!*
9) New Seattle Talent Agency Doesn't Give A Shit What Your Headshots Look Like! Get Work TODAY!
*What?! These people totally look the same!*
*ok, this one was a little silly.