Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Mumble mumble mumble.

I have been a mad person lately.
Mad:Insane
mad:grumpy
mad:proooobably not making the healthiest choices.

I probably change more than anyone I know. I'm like one of those volcanoes the science guys walk on on the television. Rock on top, crazyassed roiling lava underneath. Always in motion. I'm like that, except the next moment the volcano is a pie. Then a stack of files. Then a helicopter. Then Charlie Sheen. Then a pie again. It's why I don't follow politics. Every political argument I've ever been in has gone like this:
Me: This!
Them: No! This!
Me: You're probably right.

Yeah, it's exhausting. Buddhists call this "Monkey Mind". I call it "If I Don't Have A Glass of Red Wine I'm Going To Have A Panic Attack Mind". Granted, the Buddhists solution is much healthier than mine, but I tried meditating once, and it was scary in there. Scary and loud.

So, it's a transitional time, as I try to figure out if I'm depressed, learning to stand up for myself, or just not as nice as I used to be.

That's what's been going on. In case you wondered where I went.

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